Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Shrink and Hide

I have done so much thinking while I’ve been away from blogging. You would think that when my mind is so full that I would be overflowing with things to talk about here, but that certainly the way it has worked.

I’ve been trying to figure out where my mojo goes when it leaves me (like it has done for the past few weeks…uh, months,) and just this morning, I think I have figured part of it out. Back when I first began blogging, I did it just for fun and to show the crafts and art that I was creating. As time progressed and I turned more toward art and less toward craft, I found myself overwhelmed by comparing myself to others. In the world of art journaling, there are some awesome artists out there, and it’s hard not to compare yourself to some of them. In bathing myself in the work of others and doing these comparisons, I’ve done more damage to myself than I have good.

003I guess what that does to my mojo is to make it shrink and hide in the shadows, fearful of failing. I’m well aware that the only way to succeed is to risk failure…but I also feel like this uninspired feeling isn’t something I have chosen. What I know I have to do is to stop with the comparison, stop scouring the internet for inspiration…most of all, I must trust myself and stop being afraid of putting myself out there; to stop being so safe.

I’m not sure how I’m going to accomplish these things, I just know I have to try. That’s what 2012 is going to be about for me, my struggles to let go, to find my voice, to simplify…to IMPROVE (my word for the year!)

Thank you to everyone that commented on my last entry. Although I know I need to stop all of my dependency on acknowledgement from others, it still feels good to know I am noticed. I love each of you…truly I do.

It’s going to be a good year…I can just feel it.

Peace & Love,
Barb

5 comments:

  1. I understand what you mean about your Muse being so convinced your work is worthless that she just hides. For me, especially since I totally am NOT interested in making money, it is enough to pin stuff on Pinterest, or copy stuff to my flash drive, to look at later. I guess I'm thinking like the olde tyme folk who would copy the Masters first. I LIKE certain styles a lot, want to figure out how to do my kind of them, and that's it.
    I hope you will be able to shut your Inner Critic up, and get back to making art for YOU.
    Love you, girl!

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  2. Welcome Back!! I know exactly what you are talking about when you compare yourself to other artists out in blogland--I do the same thing. I finally got up the courage to post a couple collages on a Tumblr page for a class I'm taking. That was a big step for me. You are a wonderful artist and teacher and maybe you should take some time off from the other blogs for a while until you are feeling better about yourself. One thing I've noticed is that everyone's art is different but that does not necessarily make one person's art better than someone else's---beauty, after all, is in the eye of the beholder. You have your fans, others have their own fans. Concentrate on making yourself happy---with your work, your life---that is the most important thing you can do!!

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  3. Nothing wrong with enjoying the support of others...and yes, there are others who very much appreciate your writing, your sharing, and your heART. Could you do a few little things for yourself? with YOU as the intended audience? Maybe that will get your Muse to come out and play with you again... :-D

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  4. At times I think everyone struggles with this. Jewelry artists, sculptures, painters and art journalers. You have to realize that we are not all at the same place in the journey. Some are further along the path, some took a slightly different path, and some are following behind us somewhere just getting started. And then you have those who are off forging totally new paths we haven't even thought of yet :)

    I have been following your progress since we were on a little Yahoo group together back in 2008 and you have taught me plenty of new things to investigate on my path.

    When it gets to be too much I stop reading all of my blogs for a bit and just concentrate on playing with my journal. It usually brings me back to center and then I can go back to peeking at everyone's great journal pages again and appreciating their journey too!

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  5. Glad to see you are thinking about getting back into your art. And to repeat what has been said above, "Do it for you!" If you want to take photos of your work and keep them in a photo album for you, do it. But don't think that you need to post them to the world. You need to get back to Barb and away from the 'nets. Just clue us in ocassionally on how you are doing. Happy New Year!

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Thank you so much for taking the time to drop by. I am open to any comments, questions, suggestions, critiques, etc, so lay it on me...
Peace & Love,
~Barb~

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