“Blessed is the man who, having nothing to say, abstains from giving us wordy evidence of the fact.”
I have been off work since finishing up Monday evening about 7:30pm. I thought that having this extended time to myself would give me the inclination to blog more, do more art, do some much needed housework, list some things on Etsy and more.
Pfft! Not quite.
I think I’m falling back into a funk of sorts. I’m still creating, doing work in my art journal(s), but that urgent NEED to do some of the things that I want to do (in my head) and things that I know need to be done just isn’t there. I find myself wanting to sleep much more than I should…except late at night. It is then that I am filled with the urge to create, to write, to be alive!
I’ve been to the doc and she doesn’t seem to think it’s anymore than just a normal part of the cyclic life I live…a mild case (in her words) of manic-depression (aka bi-polar disorder). No change in meds but the encouragement to get more time outside in the sunshine, more exercise, and to just keep on keeping on.
That doesn’t solve anything for me. I am not one of those people that wants a pill to cure everything, by any means, but I’m also not stupid and know that this is not something I am able to overcome on my own…I’ve tried. For years, I’ve tried, and it’s just not working. I just don’t know what to do at this point except try hard to keep on keepin’ on.
I do know that without my art journaling, I would probably go completely insane (as opposed to the partially insane that I’m holding on to right now.) Each night, when the urges keep me wide awake, that is when my art journal(s) and I have these nice long visits. It is my friend, often times I feel as if it is my only friend, and we create together and share pain, anger, fear, sadness, joy, happiness and every other emotion that is engulfing me.
I have this dream of creating a workshop for art journaling here locally and I was working toward that end when I went back to work and that dream slowly fell by the wayside. Recently a Twitter friend and I decided to work on trying to get an art fest set up here in the South (since all the good ones are so very far away) and my inability to focus or even to feel that urge just isn’t there. I need to write a letter to someone asking for their feedback and ideas on making this art fest idea a reality…yet, I haven’t done that. And I’ve had all week to work on it.
I see what I’m doing (or failing to do) but I can’t help but be flooded with the feeling that, no matter how small the action may be, it’s just far too overwhelming to even begin anything, much less complete them.
So, I think you all can see why I haven’t had much to say this week.
But, as the old cliche` goes, this too shall pass.
I have been saving some things I like online HERE and journal pages that I find inspiring HERE. I’d love for you to take a look and maybe you’ll find something that strikes you or inspires you or just makes you think or laugh at one or another of them.
I hope you’re all doing splendidly.
Peace & Love,